An Industry off its Pills

I once thought that software projects in the Telecommunications Industry in Australia had reached a low point when projects that should be taking 6 months had been compressed to a few months.

Now its gotten even worse.

We're down to weeks!

I remember the heady days many years ago when projects would run for up to a year or more - and the Telecommunications company gained a fantastic product. Of course - I'm not naive enough to suggest that all of these projects were major success stories. Yes - there were too many failures - over time, over budget and under delivering. Or not delivering at all - especially those projects which came from the large vendors.

The large vendors only know the space in which they can make money - they never truly understand the depth of the problems faced by a software project. But the dickheads who purport to run the Telecommunications companies in Australia seem to be addicted to throwing huge sums of money at these companies for rarely a good result. Those behemoth three-letter-acronym software companies must be pissing themselves laughing - leaving a chaotic yellow trail all the way to the bank.

But it seems that the Telecommunications companies themselves are losing the plot faster and faster. If these corporations were actual people - a very odd legal fiction - then they need a good lockup Psych Ward, a straight-jacket and a fuckload of Mellaril. Or at least a good counsellor who will beat them about the head with their own inadequacies and ask a lot of seriously pointed questions about the their masturbatory fantasies.

Those of us who actually design and write software for these companies are starting to ask ourselves - is this truly all worth it? Between 2003 and 2005 the demands being placed on software developers - whether the poor beggars be in-house developers or outsource developers - has gone from vaguely insane to "I'm gonna git you with an axe in the name of baby Jeeeeezuz hahahahaha" status. Its all gone from an episode of The Office and turned into something out of Wire in the Blood or Silence of the Lambs.

So ... what's next? Software projects which implement thousands of function points compressed to the timeline of a handful of days? Hours?

Just wait for it software development fans!!

It seems that the planning abilities of major corporations have turned to star-dust. And who is paying for this?

Yes - its YOU ... whoever you may be! The next time you buy a product or service from these uncoordinated, imbecelic, infantile corporations - you are not only paying for them to pump vast loads of excrible marketting at you - you are also paying for their complete and utter inability to plan reasonable projects.

Yes - in the short term it looks great for ye olde shareholders - but in the long term they're just shooting themselves in both left feet.

And you pay for that! Don't we all feel so good about it?

Fuck darls - hand me the Prozac!